Hmmm… What’s A Friend?

I found this excerpt recently that really describes my idea of a friendship. I had some friends over last weekend and I couldn’t really put into words the way I feel when I’m around them, until I found this. I will admit that I have a lot of acquaintances…. whether they be from work, school or play, but I have a small, strong, net of some solid friends. Friends with whom, no matter how far apart we are – the bonds will never break.

It is a person with whom you dare to be yourself.  Your soul can be naked with him. He seems to ask of you to put on nothing, only to be what you are.  He does not want you to be better or worse. When you are with him you feel as a prisoner feels who has been declared innocent. You do not have to be on your guard.  You can say what you think, so long as it is genuinely you.  He understands those contradictions in your nature that lead others to misjudge you.  With him you breathe freely.  You can avow your little vanities and envies and hates and vicious sparks, your meannesses and absurdities and, in opening them up to him, they are lost, dissolved on the white ocean of his loyalty.  He understands.  You do not have to be careful.  You can abuse him, neglect him, tolerate him.  Best of all, you can keep still with him.  It makes no matter.  He likes you – he is like the fire that purges to the bone.  He understands, he understands.  You can weep with him, sin with him, laugh with him, pray with him.  Through it all – and underneath – he sees, knows, and loves you.  A friend?  What is a friend?  Just one, I repeat, with whom you dare to be yourself.

– C Raymand Beran

I guess it’s simple enough to say that just because I act “friendly” or add you as a “friend” on some social media device doesn’t necessarily mean that we’re actual friends. I think friendship is something that takes time, work, and compatibility. I feel somewhat guilty for admitting this but some people consider me their friend, but in reality I don’t consider them to be my friend. Although the number of acquaintances I have may increase, I think I’m solid in my established group of friends. This doesn’t necessarily mean that I’ll keep myself from future opportunities of developing new friendships, but when I have a solid network of friends that I can be myself around, that know details about my past, my present and future; making new “friends” isn’t very high on my priority list.

This actually makes me wonder what people think I would say if they asked me whether I thought we were friends, or not. It also makes me wonder how much I would ‘fluff’ the truth and/or soften the blow…